Use the Word 'Muumuu' in a Sentence

"Look mum; the Shamu is wearing a Muumuu"

By Popular Demand: Sugarfoot Theme Song

"Sugarfoot, sugarfoot, easy lopin' cattle ropin' sugarfoot,
Carefree as the tumbleweeds, ajoggin' along with a heart full of song,
And a rifle and a volume of the law

Sugarfoot, sugarfoot, never underestimate a sugarfoot,
Once you got his dander up, ain't no one who's quicker on the draw

You'll find him on the side of law and order,
From the Mexicali border to the rolling hills of Arkansaw

Sugarfoot, sugarfoot, easy lopin' cattle ropin' sugarfoot,
Ridin' down to cattle town, ajoggin' along with a heart full of song,
And a rifle and a volume of the law"

Bluth Family Quote of the Day

"You know, say what you will about America, 13 bucks still gets you a hell of a lot of mice"

[George Michael Bluth]

"The Good Yet Sad" - Title Winner of the Day

"EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH"

My Random and Useless Top Five List No.6

SIGNS WHEN ONE SHOULD ADJUST ONE'S MEDS:

1. I see OTHER people

2. I see MY people

3. I see YOUR people

4. I see THEIR people

5. I see NO people

Bluth Family Quote of the Day

"I think the plant lady is wearing a thong"

[GOB]

Because Bananas are Good Mmmkay

My Random and Useless Top Five List No.5

AMERICAN IDOL MOMENTS I'M WAITING TO SEE:

1. When Paula falls off her chair.

2. When Simon and Randy ignore the fact that Paula has fallen off her chair.

3. When Simon and Randy introduce a handpuppet to replace Paula who has fallen off her chair.

4. When no one notices that Simon and Randy have introduced a handpuppet to replace Paula who has fallen off her chair.

5. When the handpuppet get his freak on, starts calling himself
'The Kaj' and leaves the show to pursue an acting career.

Bluth Family Quote of the Day

"I'm going to get a lethal injection because my son won't eat a potato."

[George Sr.]

Suitable Names for a Three-Legged Horse

Billy (with a bit of Kevin thrown in)

Odd Thought of the Day: More 12yo Rodents

I asked a friend if she would mind giving me a recent photograph of herself and she courteously declined after getting some feedback of unsetteling nature on it. Apparently the public ruling was that she looks like a twelve-year-old in it - and she wasn't too happy about it.

I encouraged her to look at the plus side; at least she could save on her bus ticket for years to come. This obviously led me to ponder what it would be like to be a 12yo ferret - as I like rodents so very much.

After actually taking the time to research the subject I found out that ferrets disappointedly aren't rodents at all for they are of a species related to otters, skunks, weasels and badgers- another important lesson of why not to judge a book by it's cover. Second unecouraging aspect of a ferret - damn you ferrets! - is that they apparently normally live only six to ten years. This information complitely shattered my lifelong dream of taking a 12yo ferret on a bustrip.

The Paula Abdul School of Useful Advice No.2

"You've gotta keep it together the whole song"

My Random and Useless Top Five List No.4

MOST MEMORABLE TV THEMES:

1. Dallas (1978-1991)

2. MacGyver (1985-1992)

3. L.A.Law (1986-1994)

4. Knight Rider (1982-1986)

5. Miami Vice (1984-1989)

AND THE COMEDY VALUE NOMINATION GOES TO:

Sugar Foot (1957-1961) 'Because they used to film it
up there on the hills'

Bluth Family Quote of the Day

"Make love in your own hand mother!"

[Byron 'Buster' Bluth]

Use the Word 'Manatee' in a Sentence

"Damn, Dorothy, you ain't gonna fit in those old stirrup pants any better than I can fit a grown Manatee in our fishbowl."

My Random and Useless Top Five List No.3

WHY WOMEN DON'T CARE ABOUT FORMULA ONE RACING:

1. It's cars.

2. Driving around in a circle.

3. For two hours.

4. It's cars driving around in a circle for two hours.

5. Michael Schumacher's chin.

Introducing: Advice Column Mr.Parrot-Buddy - style

Once a week my favourite comedy value handpuppet Mr.Parrot-Buddy answers your burning questions about life as only he can. The rule is 'ask anything, expect nothing'.

QUESTION OF THE WEEK:

Dear Mr.Parrot-Buddy I'm afraid I might
be addicted to caffeine. What should I do?
Sandie

MR.PARROT-BUDDY HAS THE REPLIES:

Damn girl, Sandie!
You gonna make me late from my best gal
Little W's whacked out party! And you know that
crackden aint gonna stay supplied all night if you know
what I'm saying ho. Just cook that rice bitch!
And you better start getting used to seeing those
RedBull-fairies, because Rome wasn't built in a day and stuff.
Bird is out.

[DISCLAIMER: Mr.Parrot-Buddy is an angry and ignorant bastard of a handpuppet who has enough problems to call his own to care about yours. But if you still want to bother him with your questions, you can do so by emailing him blog_thebananas@yahoo.com ]

Bluth Family Quote of the Day

"I won't go wheelchair"

[Fake uncle Jack]

A Squirrel Loving Papillon

I recently read a heartwarming article from SEATTLETIMES.COM about a pregnant Papillon adopting herself a squirrel. After she gave birth to her babies the squirrel could be found happily napping in a pile of puppies who treat him as one of their own kind.

But all cuteness aside I started to wonder if the puppies and the squirrel would eventually start mimicking each other's habits growing up. I mean you've all heard about the dog who started to act like a bunny rabbit after living in the same household together. Not that I mind a Papillon who munches on peanuts and hops from one houseplant to another. And I guess in all fairness I have always wanted to see a squirrel on a leash...

My Random and Useless Top Five List No.2

HANK AZARIA TV CHARACTERS:

1. NAT (Mad About You)

2. DAVID (Friends)

3. Dr.HUFFSTOID (Huff)

4. APU (The Simpsons)

5. MOE (The Simpsons)

Headache Source : Pokemon

Can someone just please explain to me (in detail) just WTF is Pokemon all about!? Even my four-year-old nephew is like 'bitch please, take a nap' when I desperately try to figure this show out. A show that is obvious to him and all the other kids in their toddler years - or so it seems.

But seriously, they throw a ball in the air and it becomes this animagus figurine thingy?? And then they make these figurines fight?? Is Pokemon the thing inside the ball?? Oh and apparently they are a collector's items too.

God, I really need to stop thinking about this and save my energy solving other more important matters like which one would win in a battle: Superman or Spiderman? My money is on Spidey, because come on, he's got the sticky webs he can throw in the air! And wouldn't Superman get all tangled up in them?
Must.Stop.Now.

Bluth Family Quote of the Day

"Let me take off my assistant skirt and put on my Barbra Streisand in The Prince of Tides assmasking therapist pantsuit"

[Tobias Fúnke]

My Random and Useless Top Five List No.1

TOO OBVIOUS WEIGHTLOSS TIPS EVERYBODY IS SICK OF HEARING:

1. Eat less and excercise more

2. Drink two litres of water a day

3. Eat five portions of veggies a day

4. Take the stairs instead of the elevator

5. Avoid sugary and fatty foods

The Paula Abdul School of Useful Advice

"You could've sung it better"

Bluth Family Quote of the Day

"They don't allow you to have bees in here"

[Lucille Bluth]

About me - as if you care

Me likes: NYC, British detective and comedy shows, cats in general, bookstores with coffee shops in them, Cadbury's Cream Eggs, people who are bonkers - the good way, bon-bon popping, sea creatures, crossword puzzles, Jim Gaffigan, puppet-theatre.

Me dislikes: London transport system, two-part murder mysteries, little stickers on fruit - especially on kiwis, fish smell, cats with 'I'm busy' attitude, insanely advanced level crossword puzzles, public bon-bon popping, telling people I like puppet-theatre.

Odd Thought of The Day: Hamsters

I was talking with a friend about Amsterdam and how great it would be to live there and for the sake of efficiency she started to refer to the city as 'Amster'.
This of course led me to fantasise about an animated show about hamsters with 'Amster' being the deadbeat, meth-head brother of the lead hamster 'Harold' who runs his own successful engineering company.
Need I continue...

Fun Fact: Goldfish in Memoriam

Did you know that a goldfish has a memory span of only a few seconds? I have always wondered (no really) how a fish can live in such a small habitat without dying of boredom.

I guess this explains why they never get bored swimming around that bowl all day - they swim one circle and then forget about it as they start another one. So from this perspective it makes it a whole new adventure for them every time they start that circle. And here I was just thinking fish were dumb.

The Banana Stand is up

The Banana Stand is now up and running to cater for your gossip and fun fact needs. Enjoy the low calorie, fat free formula with slowly releasing energy to combat those pesky
mid-day snack-attacks the healthy way.
So dig in! Because bananas are good mmmkay.

General health warning: Has a mild laxative effect and might eventually lead to a harmful obsession if consumed in large portions at once.